WATCH WHAT YOU SAY
Pastor JR
Have you ever said something in the heat of the moment and wish you could take it back? Have you ever realized that one of the most powerful scriptures in the Bible is;
Proverbs 18:21 (NKJV)
[21] Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
James describes the tongue in verses 3:3-6;
[3] We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. [4] And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. [5] In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. [6] And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself.
Bit . . . Rudder . . . Tongue . . . Spark. What do these things have in common? They are all small with massive influence. James is building a case for the damaging power of our words. One rude comment can damage a relationship, one careless joke can destroy trust, one angry message can end a friendship, one gossip session can ruin someone’s reputation. Words don’t just disappear, they leave marks.
Satan uses the tongue to divide people and pit them against one another. Don’t be careless with your words, thinking that we can apologize later, because even when we do, the damage remains. A few words spoken in anger can destroy a relationship that took years to build. Remember that words are like fire; they can neither control nor reverse the damage they do.
Our speech has a power that few other capabilities possess, for our tongue can be set on fire by hell itself. Flames of hate, prejudice, slander, jealousy, and envy seem to come from the very lake of fire.
James 3:8 calls the tongue an unruly member. We use words every day to encourage or teardown, to heal or to wound, to speak life or to tear someone down. The Bible doesn’t treat communication as something small or harmless. Every sentence, every comment, every reaction carries weight, more than we realize.
James says out of the same mouth comes blessings and cursing. We praise God on Sunday and complain about coworkers on Monday. We pray for patience and then snap at the guy who just cut us off.
We find ourselves gossiping, complaining, snapping, exaggerating, judging, or posting something online that doesn’t reflect who we are in Christ.
Gossiping: It’s tweeted, posted, commented, and shared 100 times. One harmless post can spread like wildfire, hurting someone deeply.
Complaining and negativity: Philippians 2:14 says, “Do everything without grumbling or complaining.” Why, because complaining darkens your spirit and everyone around you. Negative talk poisons the atmosphere of your home, workplace, and friendships. And both create negative pathways in your mind that make this behavior automatic.
Angry Outburst: Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Your tone can either calm a storm or start one. Evaluate this behavior and ask the Holy Spirit to expose the triggers.
Words said in impulse: Proverbs 29:20 warns, “There is more hope for a fool than for someone who speaks without thinking. The Bible calls us to slow down before speaking.
James 1:19: Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
So, today let’s make a commitment to change your speech, encourage, support, praise and thankfulness will be the speech that creates our new neuropathway.
Our words reveal our heart, in Luke 6:45, He teaches that “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” Meaning your words reveal what’s happening inside you, your attitude, your hurts, your fears, your pride. So, you see it’s not just the tongue that is the problem, it’s the heart behind the tongue.
Ever notice how sarcasm slips out when you’re frustrated, or how gossip feels tempting when your heart is jealous or insecure? Or how complaints flow when gratitude is not your daily routine. Pay attention, your mouth is simply exposing what’s in your heart.
The solution is not trying to talk better, you must transform your heart by the renewing of your mind, controlling thoughts with repeated speech that lines up with the truth of God’s Word. Pray and ask the Holy Spirit everyday to help you control your speech and give you the words that bring honor to God.
Learn how to pause before speaking. Proverbs 10:19: Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.
Steps to tame the Tongue.
- Ask God to transform your heart, David prayed in Psalm 51:10; “Create in me a clean heart.” And work to align your speech with the truth of Word of God.
- Invite the Holy Spirit to take control by exhibiting the fruit of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23: But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, [23] gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! When the Holy Spirit rules your heart, he softens your speech. You Don’t just talk better, you think better.
- Practice speaking life, use words that encourage, strengthen, speak hope and build faith.
- Slow down your speech and use the formula given in James 1:19. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Must problems happen when we reverse that.
- Before answering, ask yourself is this necessary, is this loving, will this build up or tear down
- Choose kindness over winning. In argument we often what to win the point, but God wants us to win the person. Proverbs 15:4: Gentle words are a tree of life; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. You don’t have to be harsh to be honest, you don’t have to shout to be right, you don’t have to destroy someone to correct them. Truth spoken in love (Ephesians 4:15), transforms more than truth spoken with pride.
- Refuse to gossip. Proverbs 20:19 say, “A gossip betrays a confidence, so avoid anyone who talks to much.”
- Fill your mind with God’s word. Psalms 119:11: I have hidden your word in my heart,
that I might not sin against you. God’s Word does heart surgery, it changes your mindset, renews your emotions, and redirects your speech. What you feed your heart determines what you say.
- Use silence as a spiritual discipline. Proverbs 17:28: Even a fool seems wise when they stay silent. Silent doesn’t mean weakness; it is strength under pressure.
- Apologize when needed. Humility restores relationships, “I’m sorry, my words were wrong.”
BENEFITS
- Your relationships heal.
- Your home becomes more peaceful.
- Your workplace becomes lighter
- Your friendships grow deeper.
- Your heart becomes more joyful.
- Your witness becomes stronger.
- Neuro pathways are created making it easier to respond correctly, time and time again.
Proverbs 12:18: Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.